Success is not just about what we do, it starts with how we think. From the complex study of neuroscience to what every experienced leader has observed, those who lead successfully over the long-haul model certain thought practices. Even the Bible places special emphasis on the power of what we think including, “As he thinks within himself, so he is,” Proverbs 23:7; “Take every thought captive,” 2 Corinthians 10:15; and “Think about what is noble and right,” Philippians 4:8. Here are 9 things successful people commonly think about themselves, and you should too.
1. I am stronger than I think.
Successful leaders experience setbacks and suffering like everyone else. The one difference is that in the midst of hardship such as illness, divorce, loss of a key customer or employee, bankruptcy, etc., they remind themselves that they have made it through other setbacks and they will get through this one too.
2. I am not irreplaceable.
Let’s face it, deep down many leaders and managers feel like they cannot be replaced. But successful ones know better. They know that while they may be important or even vital to the organization, there were others before them who left, retired, or died, and the organization continued on just fine, and in some cases even better (which can be a bit humbling).
3. I am capable of even more than what I presently do.
Mediocre leaders have a tendency to start coasting. But just like a professional or Olympic athlete, top leaders challenge themselves to reach an even higher level. Coasting is not an option and isn’t even in their vocabulary. They push themselves to grow, keep learning, take on new challenges, overcome the obstacles in front of them, and then go even further.
4. I am more grateful for what I have than what I do not.
Successful leaders have a regular spirit of gratitude. Rather than focusing on what is missing, they acknowledge and appreciate what they do have including the sacrifices others make for them, the gifts God has given to them, the successes they have experienced, and the relationships that support them.
5. I am sure I have blind spots, and I genuinely want to know what they are.
Yes, not only do the most successful leaders have limited sight in how they act, but they also sometimes have BIG blind spots. That is not a shocker. We all do. But what is surprising is how successful leaders can be self-aware by humbly acknowledging that they have blind spots, seeking to learn from others to grow through the blind spots, and learning to manage the damage they can cause.
6. I may be important, but I am not the only important person in the room.
The more successful a leader becomes, the more they are at risk for pride and narcissism. Yet, the most successful leaders long-term are those who genuinely believe that there are plenty of important people on the team besides themselves.
7. I focus more on what can be done and how than on what cannot be done and why.
Can you imagine if Jeff Bezos said it is impossible to deliver a package in less than 48 hours, or if Elon Musk said you can’t get to space any cheaper? Of course not! That’s because successful leaders focus on what can be done and find a way to do it. Their vision to do something significant is greater than their fear of failing.
8. I highly value accomplishments, but I value relationships even more.
Many leaders have experienced success while stepping on or over a trainload of other people. But leaders with a deeper definition of success are those who can look in a mirror at the end of their lives and feel good with not only the WHAT but also the WHO.
9. I am so much more than my greatest mistake or my biggest success.
Successful leaders are great at keeping both their successes in perspective as well as their failures. Neither our biggest success nor our most embarrassing failure is a complete picture of who we are as a leader. And leaders who are successful over the long term know this and work to continually remind themselves of it.
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Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
