Success is often inspiring (except when we feel jealous that we aren’t the ones experiencing it). The underdog who rises up to the top in American Idol. The kid who creates an innovative product that gets a deal on Shark Tank. The alcoholic who overcomes his addiction. The victim of advanced cancer who is unexpectedly in remission. And here is another one – Aurora Sky Castner, who was born in a prison, graduates at the top of her high school class and is accepted to Harvard University. How could you not be inspired by that! In hearing such stories, we often say “wow” rather than “how?” While there are some lucky breaks, more often than not, success is a result of an accumulation of good decisions. For example, Aurora Sky Castner could have easily fallen into the same trap so common today by claiming to be a victim of her mom and of society overall. But she made a collection of better choices that resulted in success rather than excuses. Everyone can be successful in some way – it is all about the decisions we make. Here are seven decisions you can make that will contribute to your success.
1. Don’t allow your past to define your future.
Successful leaders seldom allow past wounds or even failures to permanently define them. Quite often it is the opposite – they use such events to motivate them towards positive movement in their lives and leadership.
2. Banish “victim” from your vocabulary.
Maya Angelou said, “Whining is not only graceless, but it can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the neighborhood.” Leaders who reach their greatest level of success do not rest on a mindset of victimization.
3. Encircle yourself with good friends.
Both at work and outside of work, successful leaders ensure they have friends who are wise, trustworthy, and loyal. Such friends provide the encouragement and critique needed by every person who wants to thrive.
4. Test every decision before you make it.
One of the traits of leaders who flame out is the way they often make decisions without careful thought and input. As a general rule, successful leaders think twice and decide once. They resist impulsivity and are quick to ask for advice.
5. Select the right mentors or coaches.
I recently interviewed several successful leaders on behalf of one of our clients. They were very impressive and highly influential. And one of the common themes almost all of them mentioned was the importance of having people speak into their lives. Likewise, Aurora Sky Castner had a volunteer mentor. Successful leaders actively seek out mentors or coaches.
6. Choose the right people to aspire to be like.
Who do you look up to? Who inspires you? Who do you wish you were like? We adopt the values and attitudes of those we want to be like. Successful people carefully select those they model themselves after. Parents and police often say, “Pick your friends carefully.” The same is true with choosing who we want to be like.
7. Watch your words.
I read about a law school graduate who used her graduation ceremony speech to attack others and inflame hostility. In other words, she did not watch her words. Proverb 21:23 says, “Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble,” (NLT). Successful leaders decide to do just that – they carefully watch their words.
Contact us to learn how you can become more successful in your leadership.
Jay Desko is the President & CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
