I was recently reminded that I have scars, a lot of them! My elbow, finger, stomach, arm… and the list goes on and doesn’t even include the emotional ones (which would be a very long list)! Every physical and emotional scar tells a story. Over the years, scars have a cumulative effect. The longer we live, the more physical and emotional scars we will have. It doesn’t matter how successful you are or how much wealth you have accumulated, scars are a part of life. Any leader, athlete, business owner, or pastor who has lived life, even for only a short time, likely has them. And they can serve a meaningful purpose. Here are four characteristics of the power of scars.
1. Scars remind us.
We have the ability to endure much more than we think. Consider one of the most difficult physical or emotional challenges you have experienced. Cancer? Divorce? Loss of a child? Such traumatic events leave lasting scars which serve as reminders that not only did we experience a difficult situation, but we made it through. In spite of the overwhelming feelings at the time of the event, we were able to move on rather than quit. Scars are a reminder of not only the past, but also of how God equips people to endure it and rise above it.
2. Scars teach us.
A number of years ago, I decided my deck needed to be rebuilt so my kids would not get splinters. So, in my usual “let’s get ‘er done” fashion, I recruited some nice but unwise friends to help do it all in one weekend. I saved over $1,000! But I also ruined my elbow with a chronic case of tendonitis that, after three injections, required surgery. My elbow cost me over $3,000 in medical bills to save $1,000 in labor. You don’t need an MBA to realize this was a very bad decision! To this day, that scar reminds me that sometimes it is cheaper to hire than to be a weekend warrior.
3. Scars protect us.
Scars are not only a sign of trauma, they are also a sign of healing. After all, there is no scar until the wound is closed. Scars sometimes protect wounds from being further injured or opened again. For example, when an employer or employee acts in such a way that results in harm and disappointment (stealing funds, cheating on taxes, not doing what was promised, etc.), it can produce an emotional scar making it difficult to trust others in the future. While that can be a horrible way to live if we do not find greater balance, it can also make us wiser, realizing that if we do not make wise choices, we can once again be harmed.
4. Scars help others.
Scars tell others that you have some level of street credibility. That you have not been protected, insulated, or sheltered. That you have been tested and tried in the school of life and have made it. Scars can encourage others that they too can endure hardship when they are unexpectedly wacked by work, health, family, or financial hardships. After all, when people are getting scarred, who do they want to talk to first? Someone who is scar free or someone who has been hit hard yet lives on? Scars help others know “She gets it” or “He understands.”
Remember the story of Thomas, the follower of Jesus who thought Jesus was permanently dead and gone after he was killed? The first thing Jesus does after seeing him is to invite him to touch the scars in his hands. Jesus, the one who could have had a scar free body if he wanted, instead chose to keep them because scars have meaning and scars have purpose. What are your scars teaching you about yourself? About God? About your leadership? About your approach to relationships?
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Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
