Leaders, managers, and team members often vent about how they are not included, not given a voice, or are not given new opportunities. Every leader has experienced this feeling of being overlooked somewhere in their past, and it doesn’t feel good. But rather than wearing your victim shirt, take responsibility for what you can. By doing these seven things, leaders and others will take you more seriously. These habits are easy, practical, and do not cost a dime.
1. Say hello.
It is shocking how powerful a simple greeting that includes eye contact and a smile can be. And it is equally shocking how often we fail to do it. While on a cruise with my family, I was amazed that almost every employee who passed me in a hallway smiled and said hello. Yes, I know it is their job, but perhaps we should view it as our job too. People remember those who acknowledge them. And they don’t easily forget those who ignore them.
2. Send notes to yourself.
Your memory alone is seldom good enough to remember the volume of details, assignments, and names you need to know. Use your phone to send yourself an email. Think of something important late at night? Send yourself a note. Meet a new person and don’t want to forget them? Send a note. Learn your colleague’s child is sick and want to follow up on it? Send a note. I send myself at least 5-10 notes every day either by email, the QckMail - Quick Reminders app, or using Siri if something comes to mind while driving. Forgetting little things will result in people not taking you seriously, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Just send a note!
3. Finish assignments ahead of schedule.
People are so used to being disappointed by others’ failure to follow up or follow through that it becomes very memorable when you not only finish a project, but you do it ahead of schedule. When people lose confidence that you will follow through on time, attention to that detail is now stuck in their minds when it should be stuck in yours. This will result in them losing confidence in you and taking you less seriously as a leader. On the other hand, the team member who is a consistent finisher? Other leaders will want that person on their team.
4. Never ignore a message or email.
This is important to do regardless of whether the message is from your boss, a key player, or someone who works for you. NEVER ignore it. It is disrespectful – “I do not care about you.” It can be arrogant – “I am too important for you.” It is demeaning – “I am more busy than you.” However, not every message is of equal importance. For example, I do not care if you are selling your kid’s bike and want to know if I am interested! But when it is related to the vision and priorities of the organization or something important to the personal life of the individual, your response matters… a lot. Leaders and employees alike often earn a D or an F in this area. We can and should do much better.
5. Complain less.
Have you seen the collars that shock a dog when it is barking too much? What would it be like if we wore a collar that, when it registered too much whining, shocked us! If it was legal, I would now be rich since every organization would be buying them. Not to mention parents! But seriously, the more we are viewed as chronically dissatisfied, the less people will want to be around us, and they will stop taking us seriously. The Bible mentions the words “grumbling” and “complaining” about 40 times, and never in the context of being a noble behavior. So, if you want opportunity, complain less.
6. Solve problems.
Leaders love problem-solvers. I was recently reading an excellent book by the CEO of one of the most respected companies in the world. He did not mind if team members identified a concern or problem, but he expected them to bring a possible solution as well. When we are quick to solve problems, we take stress off of the leaders with whom we serve, and we are increasingly viewed as someone who adds value. In other words, we are taken more seriously.
7. Keep your own house in order.
Have you ever heard someone criticize another person for something when the criticizer is not even taking care of their own issues? One person criticizing another for how they do or do not parent their kid, how they spend money, how manage their department at work, or how their leadership is inadequate, while neglecting their own problems. If we are honest, we are all guilty of this at times. But it is hard to take someone seriously when they criticize someone else yet their own leadership is lacking. Even if it is justified. The Bible refers to this as hypocrisy! People are far more likely to take you seriously when you lead your own areas well before you start to critique the areas others are responsible for.
I have never met a person who does not want to be taken seriously. But being taken seriously doesn’t just happen. We have a responsibility to do what it takes to be credible in order to have others desire our participation, opinion, and partnership.
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Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
