Everyone has likely worked with (or for) a fool at least once in their lives. You will remember it by the unpleasant aftertaste. While we have all acted like fools at some point (think: me as a teenager shooting a crossbow in my backyard surrounded by homes only 75 feet away… not wise), there is a difference between a foolish action and a foolish pattern of behavior. We are sometimes asked by people we coach, “What should I do when I am dealing with a crazy team member or boss?” Here are the warning signs that you are working with a fool and what you can do about it.
Warning Signs You Are Working With (or for) a Fool
They seldom seek advice, especially from those who will speak with candor.
They think they know better than everyone else, and usually a few others tell them so.
Their mouth often gets them into trouble or causes ruin as stated in Proverbs 10.
You seldom hear them say, “I made a mistake,” or, “I am sorry.”
Their behavior makes perfect sense to them which is why they keep doing it.
Proverbs 29 says they give “full vent to their rage” – getting an “F” in anger management.
Repetition is their reputation – they repeat their foolish behavior over and over again.
What to Do If You Work with (or for) a Fool
1. Don’t spend your time trying to change a fool.
Some people are convinced they can be the hero who brings a habitual fool to her senses. It seldom works. Why? Because fools don’t just think they are right… they know they are. They believe they are smarter and more talented than others. This is why Proverbs 1 says it well – they not only do not want your input, they despise it.
2. Keep their influence in your life to a minimum.
Don’t allow this person to shape you. You may need to collaborate with or even work for him. You can show positional respect to him, but don’t let him shape who you are as a person. I remember working for one fool where I had to follow his rules (at least some of the time), but I never gave him influence over or access to my personal life and guiding values.
3. Create firewalls of protection.
When the fool is extremely unhealthy, document his behavior or actions and consider talking it over with a safe person. You will be better protected emotionally and organizationally if you have a sounding board who can give you wise counsel on how to manage your unique situation. This can be the Human Resources Director (if they are trustworthy), an external coach, or a wise friend.
4. Work to limit the damage they may inflict on themselves and others.
Wisely try to prevent or correct this person’s bad decisions and plan accordingly. This is not easy to do, and sometimes it can further enable the fool. But it can, at least temporarily, shelter you and others from the worst elements of her stupidity. And, if you are the boss of a fool – this may mean being courageous enough to fire her.
5. Courageously confront the fool, but never alone.
The most skilled fools are notorious for turning things back on you, so always be well prepared and have another person join you. If the fool resists a third person joining you, you may need to ask the Human Resources Director (if there is one) to join you. Be sure to document the conversation as well as what you discussed with any safe third party.
6. If the fool is dangerously toxic or highly unethical, plan your exit.
While you cannot run every time you experience unhealthy people, you can and should when the fool is just plain nuts, highly deceptive, and is the boss. While it is wise to share your concerns as you leave, don’t throw grenades on the way out. Leave with your dignity and character in good standing. Remember, future employers will be watching.
7. In the most egregious cases, you may need to blow the whistle.
This is especially true if you deem his behavior to be physically dangerous to others or to result in a fatal wound to the organization. However, if you do this when it is unwarranted, you will look like the fool, and your reputation may be damaged for a very long time. And, even if it is the right thing to do, you may lose your job – but some things are worth that loss.
Remember, fools are everywhere, including in each of us. But working with or for a habitual fool can be exasperating and even toxic. These seven actions may help you, but there is no simple fix when it involves very unhealthy leaders. Sometimes, we have been asked to help a leader wisely manage these situations. Our team would be glad to help you and your organization.
Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
