We often look at others and think, “They have it better than I do.” Those who make $40,000 look at those who make $100,000 and feel like that person must have a much better life. The couple that is struggling with infertility looks at those with children and asks, “Why were we short-changed?” The pastor whose church is floundering reads the book about the mega-church pastor and wonders, “Why is that not happening here at my church?” The business owner wonders why the businesses of her friends seem to have less headaches and hassles. And on and on it can go. We are all going through different experiences, but there are three facts of life that are common to all of us. Here is a summary of what God says about these three realities.
Life is short.
No matter how rich or poor, powerful or weak, life is short. The Bible uses words and metaphors like “a wind that passes” (Psalm 78) or a “mist that appears and then vanishes” (James 4:14) to describe life. The book of Job refers to life as a “mere breath,” and Psalm 144 calls it “a passing cloud.” But one phrase sums it all up: “life is fleeting” (Psalm 39).
Principles to consider: Is what I am doing with my time and resources reflecting the shortness of life? As a leader, am I living and leading as though I will be here forever, or am I planning and prepared for the realization that it can all change in one unexpected moment?
Life is hard.
When my daughter became seriously ill and almost died at the age of 13, I remember wondering, “What just happened here?!” I was unprepared and did not grasp the principle that life is hard. Prior to that point, I had experienced minor bruises and scrapes, but this felt like a bat to the head. I was then reminded of these words from the Bible, “Why are you surprised at the suffering you are experiencing, as though something unusual was happening,” 1 Peter 4:12.
Principles to consider: If I am expecting life to always be smooth and without pain, I am going to be sadly disappointed. When looking at the lives of others, including employees, neighbors, or friends, don’t assume their lives are as they appear. Many, if not most, people are experiencing hardship behind the curtain that separates their public life from their private one.
Life is good.
Life is not going to feel “good” at every moment of our lives, but we would do well to remember that God created every person with worth and with purpose. While we may not always see this in ourselves and in others, it is there. Though we live in a world that is broken, and we are a part of that brokenness, we still have so much to be grateful for. Charles Dickens said it best: “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”
Principles to consider: If we do not intentionally focus on the ways we have been blessed, we will, by default, focus on our disappointments and what is not going well. When you are being beat down by the hardships of life, start noting the things you are grateful for. Research shows that people who focus on gratitude are healthier and happier than those who do not.
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Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
